HerStory with Mariana Alam
Can you tell us a little about yourself?
I converted to Islam 15 years ago. I consider myself someone who is aiming to live mindfully and am always looking to learn and grow. I am a history and art enthusiast, enjoy helping others and am on a journey towards living a more sustainable lifestyle. I got married in 2009 and moved from Chicago to The Big Apple with my husband.
How was that transition for you?
The plus side of living in such a big state is that the Muslim community is so diverse. I was surprised to find black Muslims, and there are more Latino Muslims now too. It is so beautiful to see Muslims from all cultures and places. We gather at NYU and find Muslims of all ages and all backgrounds. It is just amazing to witness.  I think that there’s a plus side of everything and this move to New York was no different.
Tell us a little about your journey to Islam?
Sure, it actually was very simple. It started with me making an intention as a New Year’s resolution. My first resolution was getting closer to God, that was that. My first step was to explore by going back to the faith I was born into, which was Catholic. However I had to take a fresh approach.  I decided to go to Sunday Mass, learn the Bible, and do everything I could to become closer to God. I was in a place where my relationship with God was really strained. My mom had recently passed away and I reached a point where I felt like something was missing in myself.  I then began to search online.
Can you walk us through about the day you took the Shahada?
The day I took Shahada was the first day of Ramadan. I recall being excited and nervous, but mainly happy and at ease. The process was simple. A sister I had become friends and whom I had expressed my desire to formally practice the faith of Islam and her husband helped organize the process of taking Shahada. She and her husband looked to their local mosque, MSI Masjid (Muslim Society Inc )to assist. Sometime during the day of my Shahada, I got a call early on in the day from her that all was set up and I would take Shahada after Maghreb prayer. I felt a new beginning full of exciting things but more importantly of spirituality self-fillment. It felt so right. It felt what I was searching for was realizing itself.
How did you get connected to Salihah Central?
In my search, I contacted someone named Jill. And she’s like, “Hey, there’s something happening on Wednesdays at somebody’s house.” And I said, “Okay, well, you know, I’m open to going.”  So I went!  That was the first time I met Muslim sisters. And then from there I went every Wednesday, it was a piece of the puzzle of my life that was solved.
You’ve taken many classes with Salihah Central. What has been your favorite class so far?
I had one intention, which still hasn’t been fully realized, but I don’t care if I die trying to do it. I want to become a learned person of my deen (faith). One of the classes that I remember was a Fiqh (jurisprudence) class. To this day I still use what I’ve learned in that class, and even help others. I feel there is nothing more beneficial than knowing what’s right and wrong. Fiqh lessons are important and helped me understand a lot of things. That is my favorite class and I hope to continue learning in that area.
What’s the most challenging part about being a Muslim woman?
One of the most difficult challenges for me was not having a support system that I see other Muslims enjoying. For me that’s the hardest. I sometimes have to work 10 times harder to learn things and still there are many unknowns. I’m not able to fall back on family to teach me.  Alhamdulilah, I have my husband who is my main support system. But this is the hardest part, and it’s why I’m always seeking community.
If you had to go back 10 years, what would you tell yourself?
Um, you made the right choice! Yeah that’s right girl, you did the right thing- keep going!
How do you recharge yourself when you’re feeling spiritually low? What do you do to get motivated again?
So that’s an excellent, excellent question! I’ve been working for years on this and am still working to perfect it.  First, I try not to have to go back and recharge in the first place. So I watch my environment and that keeps me strong. I’ve worked for many years on this and am proud of where I am. Alhamdulilah, now I don’t need to recharge often. One challenge is wanting to do good everywhere so you spread yourself too thin. Then, I realized, I would be depleted and I had no energy left for myself. So I started to choose where to put my energy.  I would think ‘Okay, these people are pushing me ahead, not pushing down.’ Then I’d make choices based on that. This gradually has helped me through the years.
What do you look forward to most during Ramadan?
This year I’m looking to reset and bring health to my soul. Throughout the year my mind, body and soul get worn down and Ramadan is the safe haven for me to recharge, replenish and redo my intentions.
What’s your Ramadan routine?
My routine is basic but also varies year-to-year. I have been getting up one hour before suhoor to reflect and do other forms of worship. Then I drink a glass of water/milk with dates for my pre-dawn meal, pray, and read the Quran. This year’s goal is to approach the Qur’an with fresh eyes and do self-reflections, question and research.
What are your favorite Ramadan traditions? What’s your favorite thing to eat at iftar?
I think I’m still trying to set my own Ramadan traditions. Every year has been a little different. This year a sister inspired me to give out Ramadan gifts. It’s something I already enjoy doing and more-so in the excitement of Ramadan. Other years, I’ve had traditions where after taraweeh prayer I would go have a cafecito (Spanish for coffee) with sisters. My meals are very simple and not much emphasis is paid to whatever is in my fridge. I end up eating whatever I can put together in less than 30 minutes because my energy and time is limited. Sometimes I end up ordering out.
What is the best advice you ever received as a Muslim woman?
The best advice I’ve received as a Muslim woman is when you are too religious, you become worthless to the world and when you become too worldly, you become worthless to religion.
What do you wish for the next generation of Muslim women?
This is a tough question because my experience as a Muslim woman might not be the same as others. I wish the next generation would have a safe space to be themselves, bring about their individuality unapologetically and for the world to understand and appreciate their value.
What’s the first thing you’re going to do once Covid life is over? Or what do you miss the most about pre-Covid life?
Travel. Travel. Travel. Explore and experience. Talk to people. Talk to everyone…ha,ha,ha!